Calming Fears, Or Feeding Bad Habits?
My kids have a clear cut bedtime routine. They know our expectations and rarely fight us on matters of sleeping arrangements. There is one thing, however, that I allow them to have a say in… the use of a night light. About half of my kids are afraid of the dark. I see no problem with allowing a night light in the room, as long as it is safe and doesn’t lead to messing around. My husband disagrees with me on this matter. He thinks that I am giving them the okay to have an irrational fear. He believes that the lights should be out completely and it is just too bad if they are scared.
The biggest factor in my decision to allow night lights, is my own childhood experiences. I also hated the dark. I still do. I used to hide my head under the blankets, because I was so afraid of seeing anything scary looking in my room. I fell asleep every night, with fear in my heart. It was an awful feeling. I do not want my kids to feel the same. I think that slumber should be a peaceful event, beginning with a feeling of security while they drift off.
Is my practice of turning on a night light and enabling my children to be dependent on a night light, going to have a negative effect on their adulthood? Do you allow your kids to use a night light or other comfort measure? Why or why not?
Tags: bed, bed time, childhood, fears, night light, sleepRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Catch All
3 opinions for Calming Fears, Or Feeding Bad Habits?
Robin W
Jun 5, 2008 at 2:04 pm
My husband and I have the same disagreement. Both my boys (5 & 7) have nightlights in their rooms. The younger can take it or leave it; the older one always wants it on. I don’t see anything wrong with it—I agree that sleeping time should be peaceful and calm–not a time for fear. I sometimes wonder if my husband would think it was such a big deal if they weren’t boys (i.e. he thinks it is making them “sissy”). I say “hogwash”; it’s just a nightlight!
Sherry
Jun 5, 2008 at 10:43 pm
I think you have accomplished the most hardest thing about putting kids to bed and that is having a clear cut bedtime routine. You should be very proud of yourself for that reason alone. Many parents don’t have that and struggle to get one. I grew up with a night light and it did give me peace of mind of knowing that I was alright. All the funny shapes and shadows didn’t turn into nasty growling monsters that were out to eat me. I have grown into a well balanced and adjusted person. I’ve never been in trouble with the law or have any type of police record. I only had plenty of good nights’ of rest as a child growing up. Yes, I believe a night light is a great thing, along it is not to bright. Let your kids have it. It has been suggested that men think logically, and women think emotionally. With neither understanding the other, is it any wonder that they have difficulty finding a middle ground? Men are also very visually and sometimes need to explained things in a way the can visualize it. Good luck.
BMS
Jun 9, 2008 at 8:12 am
Anything that gets the kids to go to sleep, in their own beds, at a reasonable time, that doesn’t involve heavy sedatives, is a good thing.
My boys like their nightlights. I find that using blue Christmas bulbs in them makes them much less bright, so they actually sleep. They do fine if we are on vacation without them, but if it makes them happy in their room, whatever. My eldest will probably take his blankie to college. My little one wants his favorite stuffed cat every night. I sleep best with my husband in bed, an eye mask, and earplugs - am I any different?
Have an opinion? Leave a comment: